Awake Too Late

I've been doing pretty well lately when it comes to going to sleep at a decent time and waking up early for work and going to the gym and all that jazz. Unlike my blogging, I am officially the worst blogger of all time. I accept that.

Haste the Day released their final album ever today though. Apparently this one is really really the last one after the band dispersed and came together to do this one last project. Haste the Day has been and will always be one of my favorite bands but I'm not gonna lie, not getting the same feels from this album as I did with all of their others, especially Pressure the Hinges. But I am not too disappointed... its still good. Maybe I just need to listen to the lyrics more and give the songs some more time. I'm staying up super late tonight so I can get through the whole album. I told myself I'd find time to listen to it this weekend but knowing all day it has been available has been killing me not to go ahead and listen to it... I should have given in earlier then I wouldn't be awake at 1:00am knowing I have to be up for work by 6:30am.... but it is what it is, and it is Haste the Day.

This is a pretty good one from the new album:

Now that these guys are really done and have completed the final flame... I think it marks a good time for a new HTD tattoo... since I already have the Pressure the Hinges bird.

HTD flame progression

annnd the newest:

In other life news,

I have been 25 for 2 months now and I swear it was like immediate changes in my mindset. Is that normal? Maybe mentally I was waiting for a certain age where I thought it was acceptable to just quit caring. Wait, that sounds bad. Let me try again, I now feel 100% the chill girl I have always tried to be and people assumed that I was. It isn't that I don't care about anything, I just finally care about myself more. I have never been one to worry obsessively over what people thought about me, but I would feel bad if they thought I had negative thoughts towards them or wonder why when someone didn't like me. All of a sudden even the small "hmmm...'s" seemed ridiculously silly.

I am extremely aware of the fact people have always thought, and some still think I can be super anti-social and even stuck up. Oh well. I seem to be what the internet deems "selectively social". I am an introvert with an outgoing personality. I'm weird. I love being around people but usually have to be coaxed out to get to that point. Otherwise I am perfectly content being a hermit and not speaking to anyone for a week straight.

I gave up dieting. Dieting has got to be one of the dumbest things ever. When you diet you torture yourself because all you do, constantly, is crave things you should not have. Eating yummy things in moderation is perfectly acceptable just make sure you throw in healthy things now and then if it's not your norm to start with. Damn it makes me so much happier to not diet anymore and holy shit I have lost more weight in the short time after coming to this conclusion than I did any time I tried actual diets. Oh life, stop being difficult.

25 seems to be the age where you, or I, in my case (maybe you are 25 and completely have it together, or the opposite) feel like I am right in the middle of adult and wtf. I live in a house by myself and I have a grown up job and I enjoy cleaning and cooking. Then there are days where I have scrambled eggs with hot sauce and Diet Pepsi for dinner and spend all day watching superhero movies on Netflix. Or eat an entire box of thin mints in an hour (I am not ashamed, like I said... chill mode- judge away). And then there is the struggle to have this nice feng shui bedroom, but then I have a hard time giving up things like a wall with a collage of random framed pictures and a poster of Curly, Moe, and Larry attempting to play golf. Halp me! At least I convinced Bryan it was time to take down the confederate flag hanging on one of the walls. Hallelujah. It opens up space to hang the posters I stole from the bathroom at the Fillmore. Ahhh shit. #thestruggle (do people hashtag in blogs?)  

When it comes to guys... I have the best one I can ask for. Which may seem strange to some people who don't know Bryan and I very well because it does seem to be a weird situation... but I literally could not ask for a better person to be with. Which kind of makes my next realization pointless, but attraction wise, if a guy isn't at least 5 years older than me I am not attracted whatsoever. What is that even about? I don't know. But like I said. It doesn't matter. I have a wonderful boyfriend and he is 30 years old so all is well in the world.

Lastly, after years and years (well, 8 years to be exact) of trying to figure out what I want to spend money on school for... I have decided I want to be pastry chef. But guess what? Not happening now because I can't get that degree and work my current job, and I have a great job. Guess I'll continue on with my business management and marketing degree- super exciting right? Maybe one day.. I'm not giving up on the idea, and how awesome would it be if I did get my MBA and then a pastry arts degree? Hello entrepreneurship.

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd, I'm getting zero sleep tonight.

bye.

-amby

Slacker

I really am such a slacker when it comes to this blog. I need to start keeping track of ideas I have for things to write about because I literally get SO many during the day, every day, no joke. Once it comes time to sit down and type it out... it's all gone. Maybe I have chronic writer's block. Is that a thing?

My thought process on a regular basis these days: 

I need to do better when it comes to a lot of things:

-This blog
-Gym routine
-Sleep schedule
-Eating meals at normal human times
-Making more time to play with little Pepper

Pretty much I need to get my life in order. The one thing that is currently a constant is music. I love my music. Those of you who know me, know that. I have been to so many concerts lately its a bit crazy. Last Thursday I went to see Hozier which I have videos of I may post later... kind of thinking about doing a concert page connected to this since I go to so many but we all know how I like to procrastinate and never get around to completing my ideas.

Me on an average day:

Guess what though! I went to the gym this morning before work! Major accomplishment because I felt like a zombie getting out of bed this morning, it was the absolute last thing I wanted to do. Unfortunately, it did not feel as great as it did last time I went before work... not sure if it was the lack of sleep the night before or my wonderful brain telling me I didn't need to eat breakfast before working out for an hour straight. I probably would have done better going this evening like usual... but I am proud for making myself go this morning. I just need to prepare better.

Now, while I take another couple of days to try and plan my life, here is a good tune, enjoy.

When I say take a "couple of days" to plan out my life, that probably will end up being after May 9th (aka- last day of Spring semester) because you know, this happened:

and it makes things difficult. ^

Thank you, accounting.

In the meantime you will be getting these random posts from me. Some may actually be interesting and informational but the majority will probably be like this and I am sorry. I'm such a failure!!

Oh, but I almost forgot, I get my good laptop back tomorrow after it quit wanting to charge (its finally fixed!) So that may help in the process as well. I hate this old macbook.

Happy St. Patty's Day!

-Amby

Short and Sweet, Like Spring Break

I didn't even realize until Monday that this week was my Spring Break. Not that it means a lot because I have a full time job and bills and a house to take care of and all that fun adult stuff.

Here is what I have been doing for fun... and I'm serious, fun: CLEANING AND BAKING. It's so calming and relaxing. Want to hear something crazy? I thoroughly enjoy folding laundry. I'm too domestic for my own good I think. It has its perks though, for example... I made these today just because:

YUMMY CUPCAKES

I almost feel guilty posting this as my friend is always posting healthy stuff and work out stuff and just very uplifting, motivating, informational blurbs. I'm over here like cupcakes and sugar and music and random things.

Ramble ramble.

I'll get back into the gym thing soon. Downloaded the Planet Fitness app today, its pretty neat, will get into that at a later time.

Did I mention the cupcakes have a filling?

FILLING!!!

I know you are asking yourself, "I wonder what kind of cupcakes those beautiful creations are?" Well well well, its your lucky day because I just so happen to have the answer.

Think of Nutella meets s'mores meets simple white cake meets amazingness.

It is basically a white cake with marshmallow filling, Nutella buttercream, crushed graham crackers sprinkled on top, with a piece of a Hershey's bar. I may post my recipe later. That buttercream is to die for, no joke.

I have literally listened to music all day. Haven't even touched the TV. Can't get enough of this album lately. Reason probably being that I know they will be in Charlotte on March 20th and I doubt I'll be able to go. Boo hiss. But they are sweeeeeeeet.

"Its not a fever that's keeping me up at night. I know you mean well, but you always leave me paralyzed. Don't you know, don't you know? All I need's another dose."

Goodnight, its late, and I'm a bit delirious.

I'll do better next time, promise!

-Amby